“We count our miseries carefully, and accept our blessings without much thought." ~ Chinese Proverb
I have met countless people who can describe in detail why something is unpleasant for them, why something isn’t working or what is going wrong in their life, and yet their gratitude is only a single word or short phrase. Does being able to explain in detail the reason why you have gratitude for something make a difference in the energy behind it? I went on a quest for answers.
Some people I talked with had long laundry lists of gratitude,but they seemed to talk more about their problems and complaints. Others had shorter lists, and shared beautiful stories with me about each items on their list.
I met people who had similar items on their gratitude list and different responses to my question: “you are grateful for this because…..?”
One woman I met with had written “I am thankful for my health” on her gratitude list. When I asked her “You are grateful for your health because…..”, her answer was a sharp: “Well! Because I just am, and I am insulted to be asked why!.” It reminded me of when my parents would tell me do to something and when I asked why I heard: ” because I said so”. This answer didn’t help me to understand.
In contrast, I met with Nancy who also had written on her list “I am thankful for my health”. When I asked “she was grateful because….” what she told me was: “I am thankful I have my health, because that means I can take care of my kids. I brought these beautiful children in the world and they depend on me. When I have my health I can enjoy them and take care of them. And that make me feel such a deep feeling for love and life, that I call that a grateful feeling.” In order to feel the depth of her gratitude Nancy believes that she must be willing to know why she feels gratitude. Anything less, to her, is simply lip service.
I find that every time I do this exercise I find new feelings around each incident I list in Gratitude. Several other people shared with me how doing this exercise made a difference in their feelings of gratitude.
“He who knows others is learned; He who knows himself is wise.” ~ Lao-tzu, Tao te Ching
For this Thanksgiving season, do this for yourself and see if there is any difference in the depth of your feelings of Gratitude.
Write down a few things on that you are Grateful for. And then continue the sentence with: because…..| See what you can discover with your because.
"The important thing is not to stop questioning our reasons Never lose a holy curiosity.” ~ Albert Einstein
(c) 2009 excerpt from book: Stress Out, show stress who's the boss
FRUSTRATION: -noun; the feeling that accompanies an experience of being thwarted in attaining your goals ; a feeling of dissatisfaction resulting from unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems.
That dictionary definition makes sense in a world of human emotions. However, what happens when we get frustrated and ANGRY? Or frustrated and feeling helpless? Or frustrated and call ourselves names, ie: stupid?
When we get angry or impatient during or after that moment of frustration, it is because we want what is happening right now, to be different than it is right now.
There has been an increase in buzz about the law of attraction since the release of the movie, the Secret. Many people will proudly declare “law of attraction” or LOA, when they get a parking space, a table without waiting at a restaurant, a green light at an intersection; and in the next breath deny or ignore all personal responsibility, when IT doesn't go the way they wish.
If you observe what you are thinking in your own mind, you will see that when you come face to face with your frustration over what IS happening right now, that your habitual thoughts will first condemn. Then your thoughts begin to compare IT (what is happening right now) with 'what IT should be'; or you search and listen for thoughts to justify IT. And then your next choice of emotions begin.
Anger related to frustration is a form of tantrum throwing. Many people have developed the habit of magical and microwave type thinking that IT must change and IT must change now.
Like the TV show from the 60's, Bewitched, the most effort many people want to have to exercise is to twitch their noses and have IT change instantly. (Eventually we would get angry with having to twitch our noses all the time and we would want IT to change without having to twitch).
Our anger doesn’t want to learn anything new, or do anything different – we just want IT the way we want IT without any further effort on our part. (see small child foot stomping emphasis here)
Many people have developed the habit of accepting feelings of helplessness sometimes just after the anger or accompanying it. The helplessness comes from lumping this one IT into all the other IT's that are (allegedly) going wrong in our life – and our negative emotions escalate. It's difficult to eat an entire buffet at once. It's much easier to focus on one course and one bite at a time. Yet we lump all our life events into one mountainous illusion, and dwarf ourselves in its shadow.
And in moments of low self esteem, name calling rears its head. This behavior has no positive value and only creates more feelings of helplessness and unworthiness. Your frustration turned into self loathing is telling you that you are operating on an old limiting belief about yourself. This may require additional introspection on the topic of self worthiness.
WHAT IF you were hiking in beautiful nature and enjoying the journey and you came upon a stream of water you needed to cross. Would you sit down and get angry that the stream was interfering with your hike; or you would look for an answer around you for how to get across; or you would call upon your creative mind; or you would give up and retreat? So many choices.
Anger, feelings of helplessness, frustration and name calling close the door to possibilities. It can be painful when we bang our heads against a closed door.
WHAT IF there was a lock on that door that only required a key? Would you start looking for the key, get angry because it wasn’t already in your pocket, or keep banging your head and increasing the pain, or would you give up?
You actually already possess that key, and it is within your reach.
WHAT IF you looked at a frustrating IT as an opportunity? And I’m not talking about that see-saw string of words chimed by so many New Agers ..."Here’s another spiritual opportunity for growth……”
WHAT IF – at the first moment of frustration you took a moment to ask yourself –
"why am I reacting the way I am?”
when I have reacted this way in the past – have those times gotten me closer to or farther away from my desired result?”
“what is my intended result with my behavior, my actions or the activity I am involved in right now?”
"am I willing to I learn something new that will enhance my career or quality of life?"
"am I learning a new way to use my creative mind?"
"Is this an opportunity to let go of an old habit and accept what is right now, so I can learn a new habit?"
"Am I willing to apologize to myself and forgive myself?
WHAT IF – in that moment of reflection you heard from your inner self that this frustrating IT was an answer to something you had previously asked for, or an opportunity to learn something new in your moving forward energy in life or career, orthis IT was an opportunity to learn something new to complete something from your past?
How would you respond to that frustrating IT now?
I am suggesting that you decide in the right now, in the IT of frustration how you want the next moment to be. I am suggesting you take responsibility for your reactions and choose the one that moves you closer to your desired result.
Whether you refer to what happens in your life as Law of Attraction, Law of Return, Karma, Synchronicity, Law of Reciprocity, Cause and Effect, The Golden Rule , Energetics, etc - the bottom line is your responsibility. You are responsible for the choices you make and the results that occur because of the choices you make.
“One new perception, one fresh thought, one act of surrender, one change of heart, one leap of faith, can change your life forever.” ~ Robert Holden ~
When we present a topic we also like to offer Keys to assist you in finding your solution.
There are several Keys to assist you in moving through Frustration to empowerment.
“ We must also be careful to avoid ingesting toxins in the form of violent TV programs, video games, movies, magazines, and books. When we watch that kind of violence, we water our own negative seeds, or tendencies, and eventually we will think and act out of those seeds. " ~Thich Nhat Hahn
An updated edition of The Famous Little Red Book That Makes Your Dreams Come True.
Countless people followed the simple message and have seen dramatic changes in their lives. To get what you desire is no more mysterious or uncertain than the stereo waves all around you. Tune in correctly and you get a perfect result.
In the simplicity of the original book, some people miss the depth of The Plan. Throughout this updated edition you will find Keys which are suggestions and exercises to assist you in utilizing the information you read.
Reading these words alone will not create results, action is required. The Keys assist you in accelerating the results producing process.
If you are really serious about changing your present condition, here is a concise, definite, result-full plan, with rules, explanations and suggestions.
Others have these things. Why not you?
Excerpts of this book are available on Amazon Search Inside.
LOUISE HAY, the pioneer who taught us the metaphysical causes behind myriad physical ailments and how to apply positive affirmations, is the subject of an important documentary film entitled YOU CAN HEAL YOUR LIFE. This film, which offers an intimate look into Louise Hay's moving and inspirational life story, shares her views on self-esteem, abundance and healing.
In this entertaining film, Wayne Dyer, Esther and Jerry Hicks, Dr. Christiane Northrup, Doreen Virtue, Gregg Braden, Gay Hendricks, and Cheryl Richardson, share their personal stories about the impact Louise Hay has had on their lives.
YOU CAN HEAL YOUR LIFE is the feature film in the Vol. 12, 2008 collection of films from the Spiritual Cinema Circle, the only DVD club specializing in films that inspire love and compassion. Receive YOU CAN HEAL YOUR LIFE plus 3 great short films free (plus nominal shipping fee) by visiting www.spiritualcinemacircle.com before December 12, 2008.
"Louise Hay was the catalyst to my becoming aware of the importance of being good to me. The horribly unkind voice in my head constantly criticized me until I began to understand that I was the power behind my good health and happiness just by the thoughts I think and the words that I speak." Mariel Hemingway, Spiritual Cinema Circle Co-Host
It's a limited time offer to get the free Heal Your Life DVD. You must respond before December 12th. www.spiritualcinemacircle.com
A recent question submitted: I am currently reading the manuscript "The Science of getting rich" I also read the book "The Secret". I now have a more positive outlook which has changed my life and given me the courage to start my own business. The manuscript I think I will read again because it is a little bit harder to comprehend the first time. "acting in a certain way''. Insight please?
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"Acting in a certain way" means to have your actions congruent with your desires for riches; whether those riches be financial, material, relational or emotional. Zig Ziglar, one of the trail blazers in motivational speakers would tell stories whereas someone would say they wanted to earn more money in their business. Then they would contradict that statement by not clarifying their goals, not writing a plan, not preparing for meetings, not following up on promises, not taking care of themselves in a healthy way so poor health would prevent them from exhibiting their best, and so on. When a persons thoughts and actions are synchronous with their goals, they are acting in the way of successful people. When a person stays conscious of what they think and speak and how they act, they soon have the opportunity to see if they are acting in a way that will take them closer to or farther away from their goals and desires.
How long does it take to heal from the perception of an event or the infliction of a wound?
Medical experts have theories on how long our body should take to heal from an illness or physical wound, however, what about those emotional wounds?
Some people seem to float through, others bounce back quickly and still others seem to suffer indefinitely? Is there a right and a wrong way to heal?
The answer is: your healing is YOUR healing.
The only one to determine if you are healing in the manner that is best for you - is YOU.
I met a man last week, Steven, and his Grandfather, Charles, of whom he was quite proud. Steven's Grandparents had been married for over 40 years, until the his Grandmother passed away. A number of months after the death of his wife, Charles started dating again. When he did this, he received criticism from friends and family. Some were voicing their opinion as to whether he had loved his wife, to be moving on so quickly. They saw his behavior as uncaring and selfish, and took every opportunity to tell him. They believed in a societal time frame on healing after the death of a "loved" one, and he was violating that social time limit in their eyes. almost daily someone would say to him, "If you loved your wife, then how could you betray her this way after death". He felt attacked. He felt he was the one being treated unloving. He stayed true to what he knew was his healing journey, what was right for him.
When he announced his plans to marry his new girlfriend less than 18 months after his first wives death, many of Charles' "friends" refused to attend the ceremony.
As you heal a wound or a loss in your life, are you following a healing time requirement that was set outside of yourself, or are you listening to inspired guidance and following inspired action on your journey?What is your reaction to another persons' healing process?
Did you have a reaction to Charles' story?
Did it empower you or show you a pre-mature cognitive commitment that you have embodied?Mindfulness is a powerful Key. Be mindful of your reasons for your opinions and judgments, Create the most loving healing space for yourself by embracing your healing journey and healing on your terms. This is a powerful key to loving yourself.
before December 12, 2008. 
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